I would like to thank everyone for all of their good wishes and comments that you have left on my blog. I am so touched that you would take a few minutes out of your busy lives to do this. My last few posts have not had any photos -- which make them kinda boring. Photos are what always draw me in to reading other's blogs - so don't tell me that it doesn't matter.
I'm doing OK. Chemo starts in a few days and I'm still uncertain about how I feel about this. After all these friggin' tests and doctors telling me how sick I am supposed to be - I'm trying hard not to give in to their "mind games". I still want to believe in Magic, Fairy Tale endings and MIRACLES! I actually had one doctor (whom I refer to as Dr. FAH - if you stop and think about it long enough, you will be able to figure out what F.A.H. stands for and if this offends anyone, I'm sorry; otherwise, you'll laugh your head off) ask me why I picked a disease that doctors like to treat. Needless to say, Dr. FAH and I butted heads right from the git-go. Thankfully, he was only a second opinion. I'm certain that his opinion of me was pretty similar to how I felt about him (he-he). My son went with me to this appointment and he could feel the tension in the room when he walked in. He knew his mother was in "smart ass" mode.
I've been having a lot of "Panic Attacks" at 4 in the morning, which is kind of funny, since I love the new Gwen Stefani song by the same title. (Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring & I want to make it worth the fight.) See, I warned you that I'm rambling.
Last night, we had a thunderstorm and I actually sat on the front porch and watched the storm roll in -- I don't think that I ever took the time to do that before. It was awesome!
My Moon Flower is finally blooming. I started a whole package of seeds and only two seedlings emerged. I took this photo at dusk, but by later in the evening it was wide open. It was beautiful even though white flowers are not really a favorite of mine.My Black-eyed Susan vine is starting to bloom, too! I had only planted these in this pot a few weeks ago and they looked so small. It looked like a pot with a trellis in it and now you can't even see the trellis.
Quilting has kind of taken a summer vacation. I did manage to sew the final border on this quilt that I started about 4 years ago. I don't know what I was waiting for. This was going to be a housewarming gift for my son when he moved into his house (4 years ago), but I like the quilt top so much, that I may just keep it for myself.
As you can see, I couldn't get a photo of it without my quilt model, Bailey. I think he likes it too. Now, will I get it basted and quilted any time soon? Who knows.....
13 comments:
Kim,
I am so sorry you are going through this and that you have to endure insensitive doctors. I have no magic words of wisdom, just know you are in my prayers! I'm sure Bailey will be right there to provide you all the puppy love you can stand :)
{{{hugs}}}
Your quilt is lovely and Bailey is the perfect model.
Your positive outlook will continue to baffle people - no one understands how you can not possibly see anything but dark skies. I know all about it. In March I had a 3' x 5" mass removed from my right breast. My husband was a wreck, my friends were freaked out, and I just said I wasn't going to worry about it until I had actually HAD something to worry about. As it turned out, the growths were benign, but will probably recur. (Hopefully next time they can do the boob job on the left side) ;o)
You have a hill to climb, no doubt. And you aren't really sure what's on the other side (or where the top is, even) But whether you walk in sunshine, or walk in rain is your choice. I'm a new visitor to your blog, but from what I've seen, I have no doubt that either way, you won't be climbing alone.
You go, girlfriend! Tell them to take a hike...and hang on to your 'kick ass' attitude!! :D We're all cheering you on...and snuggle up to Bailey! Puppy love's the best medicine!! :>
I couldn't figure out what FAH meant, but I can imagine. I can't believe how insensitive doctors can be. It's great you have a positive attitude.
Bailey acts like your raight hand man. Keep him around. He'll keep you happy.
Sounds like Dr. FAH really was - LOL!
Believe in miracles and fairy tales - because they really do come true. It happens all the time but you just never hear about the good stuff like you do the bad stuff. So BELIEVE!!
Hah! Like your name for the doc- whoops almost wrote cock!
You give em as much as you like.
I love that quilt top, & dear little Bailey sitting there so cute.
Hugs Kim XX
So glad to read an update from you Kim! Hi Bailey! Sure hope that your middle-of-the-night panic attacks go away - you need some good restorative sleep.
PS I believe in miracles - and it will be one if you don't kill
Dr. FAH!!!
Hi Kim,
Best wishes on your Blogiversary!
I like your quilt, and Mr. Bailey is looking sweet as usual.
White flowers are some of my favorites. There is something simple and restful about them, that I really like.
Well, it's good that the doctor you don't like, won't be treating you! I wonder what his nickname for you is! LOL!
Most of your care is going to come from the nurses that you'll see when you go in for your treatments ect. They're usually pretty wonderful people, if you give them a chance. One of the things that irked my step-mom the most, was always being told that her symptoms, ect. were "normal". She said none of it was "normal" and she used a lot of "blankety-blank" words to express herself! LOL!
Mention the panic attacks to your doctor, if you haven't already.
I'll keep believing in magic and all good things, and I'll send those thoughts to you.
Prayer works, and mine are going up every day for you chick! :) I'm glad you got to enjoy the "light show" of the thunderstorm. I LOVE our storms here in WI. I turn off all the lights, open the windows and enjoy the show. Good luck with your cootie-killing and we'll all be thinking about you!! :) HUGS!!! :)
Praying for you daily, and especially now as you start your treatments... your attitude and spirit will take you far, hang onto that. Your Bailey and my Hannes must be cut from the same cloth, I simply cannot photograph a quilt on the floor without a furry 'addition'. The quilt is great!!
Kim, keep on believing in your miracles. They happen every day! Do tell your doctor about the panic attacks. There is medicine to help that. My awake time would occur about 2 AM. I would pray for everyone I could think of as well as myself (and especially for my doctors). I will be praying for you.~ann
Aww Bailey! what a pal! I loved your name for Dr. FAH - That's the spirit! Made me laugh!
I'll be praying for you. Be sure of that.
That's a super quilt, I would want to keep it myself too.
Regards,
Lynda :o)
Kim... thinking of you today... (hugs)
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